The pressure on women to be as close to perfect in the eyes of men, media, other women and themselves can be overwhelming from time to time. It's the kind of pressure that drives a woman like Heidi Montag (See I'm Disappointed in America: Heidi Montag) to go outside of her mind and totally reinvent herself in one day. It's the kind of pressure that speaks to the insecurities in many women and drives them to purge themselves and shrink into some preconceived concept of beauty and fitness. It's the kind of nonsense that challenges their self-assurance and esteem and allows a little "happy weight" to make them sad.
I looked at my bulging gut against my wife beater and thanked God I'm a man. Sure I can stand to lose a pound or 20, but the truth is I don't feel as though I'm under a microscope 24 hours a day or the pressures of competition. I traded basketball for seafood Saturday with Will, fried chicken and steak a few times a week and good vodka. This stomach is the result of good living (and bad habits) and ladies don't fret if the hard work you've put into your life has added a few pounds that going to take even harder work to get off. It's ok, we like 'em a little thick.
You can lie all day about wanting to get in shape for health reasons; I can see changing your eating habits to help you there. But some of yall overdo it, in the gym at 5am, at lunch and after work, drinking a smoothie for dinner and fasting until that vein in your forehead begins to pop out. All because you caught yourself doing the hop and skip into one too many pairs of jeans do you now want to starve yourself and turn your figure into a single digit. Hey, whatever makes you feel better, but if that really makes you feel better about yourself, your weight wasn't your issue.
I've noticed a pattern of single women on a mission to slim up because there's blood in the water and you feel like you have to be fierce. The truth is, slim, thick, or BBW, we're always gonna size you up, whistle, catcall, holla, buy you a drink or two, and try to practice going half on a baby. Please believe we understand you got those hips from your mama and her mama and we're fine with that. Actually, we love you for that. I'm just saying, a Zumba class here and there is cool, but Dr. Ian's 4-Day Diet in 2 days ain't kicking it. Some of you out there are on an incredible shrinking woman diet and withering away. Have you seen Kerry Washington (see Race) lately? Her head is as big as Oprah's and that ain't cool. Slow down before you go on your next fast and look at what really qualifies as your happiness before you crunch yourself up into someone else's fantasy of you and allow yourself to be eaten alive because you're not eating (Shoutout to Audre Lorde).
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