Crowd Control

Some people will tell you that man was created equally or all men are the same, but I'm here to tell you that's a damn lie! There is one major difference between Black and White men that I must bring to light right now. No, no, no, I'm not talking about THAT difference, I'm talking about the inherent need for space that brothers have and White guys disregard. It's been bothering me for quite some time that white boys seem to invade personal space, but I reached my boiling point this morning and cannot allow this social offense to continue quietly.

Missy do you remember when we were at the Plainfield game in Bridgewater in the middle of dozens of open seats when dude sat above me like he was gonna braid my hair? It is infractions like those that I can't tolerate anymore. A message to my Caucasian brethren: Brothers need space! Back up off of me! I go to the movies with my dad and we sit with three or four seats between us, even in a crowded theatre. But White guys practically lift the armrests to sit next to their homies. I won't venture as far as to say its homophobia, but there's an innate desire for us to believe that we need room, I guess it's the way we're socialized. The closers brothers get in non-athletic contact is when we greet or part with one another, you know those ritualistic handshakes we partake in that take longer to complete than the conversations that follow or precede them.

I was standing in line at WaWa last week and a dude squeezed between me and the automated machine to order his sandwich. Manners aside, I was uncomfortable that he felt comfortable enough to stand that close to me. Hell, I had goose bumps he was so damn close! Even worse was the guy who damn near was in my back pocket as I paid for a book at the Dallas airport. The final straw came today when I was in the bathroom and a guy broke the ultimate rule of bathroom etiquette…he used the urinal directly next to me! Every man knows there's a one urinal rule in the men's room and if you can't wait, you go to a stall. But not this guy, four stalls and he passes two to use the one next to me, he set himself up for that sprinkle on his Rockports!

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