It’s not a big secret how much Soul music has impacted my
life; but having been born in the late 70’s and coming of age through the 80’s
and 90’s in Black America, there was no way that I wasn’t going to be affected
by Hip-Hop. Like millions of others finding their way through life during this
time period, I grew up with Hip-Hop and just like some of my oldest friends, we’ve
grown apart. There’s much to be said about how the exposure we have to world
shapes up and causes us to look at relationships we maintain; I have dissociated
myself from friends that chose paths I couldn’t agree with, walked away from
girlfriends who suffered from esteem issues and looked myself in the mirror to
pick apart my faults dozens of times and pledged to change.
That’s where I am with Hip-Hop right now, it’s the old
friend that I really can’t kick it with anymore, because we’re at two
diametrically opposed places in our lives. However, the memories are far too
powerful to simply walk away from, though not strong enough to still bind us.
It’s been tough watching my old friend suffer, wishing I could lend a hand, but
what can one man say when millions are supporting a wayward lifestyle? I live
in the past, hoping Hip-Hop will stop one day to look back and remember when it
was all so simple?
Hip-Hop has shaped, altered, and even saved my life many
times over the last 32 11/12 years, so I’m eternally grateful for
the years we’ve had and optimistic that our friendship will be reconstructed
one day, because I can’t imagine not having my dear friend Hip-Hop as part of
my life. I look at old photos, home videos and recorded messaged Hip-Hop has
sent me through the years with reverie, reliving the potential of greatness, watching
it fulfilled and then seeing it squandered as I peek through my fingers.
This isn’t my first attempt to reach out to my old friend,
but previous tries have fallen on deaf ears, even the homie Nas tried to
intervene, but was openly ridiculed and rebuked. One of these days, I pray,
Hip-Hop will get its act together and finally reach the heights it set out to
reach. Until then, I’ll continue living my life, remembering the past and
hoping for a better future.
Two Fingers!
T-Double E-F
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