Dear Summer Pt.2: The 96 Degrees in the Shade Version


In my last missive I attempted to be diplomatic and use a bit of finesse to express my displeasure with you. Obviously you've chosen to ignore my sincere attempt to hold us together, so I've decided that I can't do this anymore. It's over! I'm over you! I should've left your ass a long ago, when my uncle invited me to move to the Bay Area where Summer knows how to treat their loved ones. Where do you think we are? This is Jersey, I long for the days when the temperatures stay in the late 80's and are sandwiched by rain and a day or two where the temperature never makes it past the year I was born. So we're officially done, I'm moving on, I'm even getting my birth date altered to October 5th to symbolize the dissolution of our union.

Our love affair ended long before I was ready to admit it and I've tried to keep it together all of these years in hopes that one day we would be able to reconcile, but I can see that you want no parts of any reconciliation. How else do you explain three days of the temperature hovering around 100 degrees? What exactly am I supposed to do on days like these? I get it, you want me to run the AC and fans all day, like you don't have first-hand knowledge of my legendary battles with my light bill? You know how hard it is for me to summon the energy to get up for work these days, imagine how I feel when Sam Champion is talking about Heat Advisories and triple digits? How am I supposed to feel when I it's 85 degrees at 7am?

This isn't my idea of fun! Bad enough people lose their minds at the sight of you, you had the nerve to make it scorching hot on the granddaddy of all holidays, the 4th of July! I had to deal with the smells of bad meat and good weed, along with folks thinking it was cool to hang out until 3am and you know you can't differentiate between gunshots and fireworks, so I stayed low until I saw a starburst of color.

You'd rather appeal to those that love your wild side and the whims it generates, instead of someone that's been loyal to you despite the overtures of three others. I understand, you have daddy issues and the attention boosts your esteem, but that's something you need to work out on your own. I'll admit that I flirted with Fall and had a fling or two with a Spring, but you've gone too far this time, you wanted to throw your dalliances in my face. I know the way a nigga was living was wack, but you don't get a nigga back like that! I'm a man with pride, you don't do ish like that. You can't throw away what we had just like that. You don't just pick up and leave, leave me sick like that! I was just messing around with them, I was gonna get right back!

You can have those that would rather spend their hard earned money to please you, I moving on to bigger and better things. I gotta watch my ones these days, because it's trickin' if you ain't got it. Quite frankly, you aren't helping my growth as a man so I'm trying to find something a little more stable, with a little more substance, that's a lot more into me. So it was fun while it lasted, but I need to ease on down the road, because I just can't be a Summer love anymore…