Let me get this straight. Once a year, I’m supposed to forget all of the fights, forget the other women, and forget about being stood up and all the unanswered phone calls? For what? For us to go out to dinner, for you to give me flowers, candy and a card, and for me to give you sex; all in the name of some saint whose name wasn’t even Valentine? Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? Then why do you do it?

I don’t think I’ll ever understand why, on this one day, you expect so much when everyday should be this special. Gold diggers, relax. I see the gleam in your eyes, but I’m not talking about the material things. I’m talking about romance. I can’t speak for everyone, but daily romance should be a standard. Valentine’s Day has allowed women to sell themselves short. He can do what he wants, when and how he wants, but on February 14th, if he doesn’t carry out some ridiculous display of his affection with a grand romantic gesture, it’s over. Or, if he does follow through, he gets a pass? Seriously, ladies, step your dating standards up. Please realize that it’s not all his fault that he’s not romantic all the time. Stop nagging that man about things that you KNOW men do. It may actually be a mistake when he leaves his socks on the bathroom floor. Start giving him the ‘special sex’ you save for his birthday, every day. Trust me, if you don’t do it, there’s always a willing candidate waiting to take your place and do it with no hands. And please stop trying to break him down. He doesn’t need to hear about how your co-worker’s man bought her a fancy floral arrangement or took her on some exotic vacation. Show him how much you appreciate him, for the small things especially.

Men, by no means am I saying you need to spend your last dime showering her with gifts and dining out every day. But it would be nice if you sent her a ‘thinking of you’ message every now and then. Cook her dinner once in a while. Give her a massage without the expectation of sex. (Trust me, she’ll be so caught up in the fact that you’re not expecting it, she’ll be BEGGING for it.) A woman wants to feel like a woman, first and always. And it’s the small gestures that do it, fellas. Since feeling appreciated is so few and far between, Valentine’s Day is forcing your hand in buying into the commercialism. You get to slack off for most of the year, but on this day, you spend more on her than you probably will all year, with the exception of Christmas or her birthday. Guys, step your romance game up.

Is this what your dating lives have been reduced to? Sadly, yes. You’ve allowed one day out of the year to put you in a box. Your expectations of romance are so low that people actually look forward to getting a marriage proposal on Valentine’s Day. What happened to the spontaneity of it all? The not knowing when it’s going to happen makes it more romantic, don’t you think? Can we get back to a time when romance was romance all year long? When people weren’t dangling over ledges because they didn’t have a date for Valentine’s Day? Back in high school, we were experimenting with the prospect of romance, so it made sense to display it on this one day. We didn’t know any better. But of all the habits and all of the silliness you’ve outgrown since then, why couldn’t this be one?

Valentine schmalentine…

About T. Burnett
I don't have the mind of the typical woman. Life has taught me to see things from all sides. You were thinking it, I just have the balls to say it. Take a journey to The Recesses of My Mind and follow me on Twitter (@cocomecocoa).

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