All I Do is Win, Win, Win

Admittedly, I was as interested in all of this Charlie Sheen madness as I would be in attending a Lady GaGa concert, just not my idea of fun. However, he invaded every aspect of media, forcing me to catch glimpses or at least feedback from his appearances. We’ve known Charlie Sheen for a very long time, but we’ve never gotten to get to know him as we have in the past week. Of course, he’s Martin Sheen’s son, brother to Emilio Estevez, but the two of them and A&E’s “Intervention” crew can’t save this man from publicly imploding. We’re at the end of the week and the hoopla is dying down, but if you ask Charlie...he’s winning!

Through the years he’s appeared in the tabloids as much as he’s appeared onscreen, he’s “accidently” show an ex, overdosed, was Heidi Fleiss’ client #9, called ex-wife Denise Richards a “nigger”, has gone in and out of rehab, been married three times, allegedly held a wife to his most recent ex’s throat and scared the daylights out of a porn star in a hotel this past October. However, he still managed to pull in nearly $2 million per episode for “Two and a Half Men” about second chances! Bobby Brown can’t even get a record deal and he’s probably been clean for five years.

Yet, just when you thought he had to hit rock bottom after his October brush with the law, he went to the abyss. It all started when “Two and a Half Men” had its season scrapped after being on hiatus, because its star just couldn’t get himself together. Sheen went on the offensive, launching into attacks on the show’s creator, then CBS, asking for $3 million an episode. He also claimed that he cleaned up at home, at a rapid pace and went on to denounce AA.

If it had all stopped there, I wouldn’t have gotten so many laughs at his expense; there were appearances on “Piers Morgan”, “20/20”, “The Dan Patrick Show”, “The Alex Jones Show” and “Good Morning America”, where he announced that he was “high on Charlie Sheen”. The “sheen-isms” were born, in response to be asked if he was bi-polar, he said that he was “bi-winning”, claimed to have tiger blood and Adonis DNA, said CBS picked a fight with a warlock and the beat goes on. As if radio and television wasn’t enough, Sheen took his talents (and dysfunction) to Twitter, gaining over a million followers within a day and continuing to spread the “winning” to his followers. He’s living with two women he’s calling “goddesses”, one is the prerequisite porn star, the other, who knows.

When Whitney Houston famously told Diane Sawyer that “Crack was wack!” back in 2002, crack sales plummeted on every Martin Luther, but the fact that Charlie Sheen celebrated “banging 7 gram rocks” because that’s how he rolls, sent the drug soaring into a new stratosphere. The sadness associated with this is not limited to his downward spiral or the fact that an amnesiac America will not remember this week on his next ascent to the top, it’s buried in the fact that Sheen has five children, his youngest of which, were not removed from his household until a couple of days ago. We’ve witness his collapse, but his children and the people who love him are living every minute of it, which is sad, because he seems totally oblivious to how he’s affecting those who care for him.

Charlie Sheen’s a crackhead, not the DMX type of crackhead, he’s even worse off because he believe he’s the cure to his own problem. The destruction of Charlie Sheen has become must-see TV and it doesn’t appear to be slowing anytime soon, as he continues to claim he’s clean and soak up every opportunity to spout his winning philosophy. That’s the issue with addiction, people get in their vices so deeply that they totally disregard the world crumbling around them, but Sheen’s winning, while his family and friends are rapidly losing him.

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