What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: Mr. Fix-It aka Captain Save a Hoe

Baby, I know what you've been through/So I'm here to relieve you/Remind you/Renew you/Rebuild you/Girl, I'll do whatever it takes just to reshape what he messed up.

Thousands of brothers are singing this song in their everyday lives, seeking out women that are damaged beyond repair, in hopes of turning them into the woman of their dreams.  It’s in a man’s nature to rescue a damsel in distress, but some of these chicks need to be left to the wolves…but you can’t tell that to Mr. Fix-It aka Captain Save a Hoe; he straps his cape on daily and goes out to get his heart broken, bank account emptied and credit score jacked up! He has seemingly made it his life's mission to play the fool enough for many men. He’s out to help as many broken women as possible, never learning that you can’t fix everything that’s broken, some things you just have to discard as junk and keep it moving.
Women can smell a sucker around the corner and they see you coming a mile away; the ease with which you pay for her drinks and smiles, your willingness to pay the cable bill or fix that pre-owned BMW and buy school clothes for her kids are the stuff of comedy anywhere Brothers form a circle to talk about your square ass. However, you’re as oblivious to the ridicule as you are to the uselessness of your love on that woman. She made up her mind long before you thought you could save her that she wasn’t worth saving, but still you pour your heart into her reclamation and your money into her salvation, neither of which you’ll see the fruits of your labor.
While you and I were still counting the hairs on our chins, she was being wronged by every man in her life – her father, teenage love, dirty old men in the neighborhood, her favorite teacher, the boy she loved and gave herself to first and the first of many men she gave herself to that she never loved. Then here you come with your shield, promising to be different, promising to erase all of the pain of the previous men in her life and protect her from any futuristic pain, but she’s immune to your claims and hip to your jive, you’re just like all of the others...a disappointment waiting to happen.
Regardless of your intentions, your actions and the effort you put into showing your dissimilarity, the relationship doesn’t last and you’re left with your head in your hands wondering where did it go wrong? You knew it was never going to work; it was the same story with Lisa, Angela, Pamela and Renee, all of whom fit the same profile. The truth is, you’re trying to define your manhood by showing your worth to a woman, instead of looking for a woman that matches your worth and your work.
Far too many fellas are intimidated by women who seemingly have it all together. The women with great careers, more education, confidence, own property and have excellent life experience are too much of a challenge for some cats that aren’t strong enough to sit face-to-face with their equal or someone that challenges them to be better. Instead, they search for someone they feel will need them, someone that has to depend on them, someone that will indebted to them for saving them and changing their situation. Fat chance! It’s more likely a woman will resent you for thinking she needs saving than show her gratitude, leaving you on a barstool with your cape dragging, looking like a damn fool!

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